« The satiny assassin »
2004-06-22 · 7:29 p.m.

The weirdest (okay, maybe not the weirdest, but whatever) thing happened to me today: I had to buy new foundation garments (seriously) and I went up a cup! For some reason that is really bizarre to me. It's not like I've been taking scary Chinese herbs or something. I mean of course I've been taking herbs, but I didn't think they provided natural decolletege enhancement among their many other uses. But if this is true, why doesn't Matthew McConaughey have gigantic tits?

So guess what, I graduated high school last Thursday. Please send your monetary contributions to my graduation fund by the end of the month. Thank you.

I have to re-dye my hair because it's fading back to brown. Every once in a while now I wake up, look at my reflection in the bathroom mirror (which I've passed out in front of the night before), and say to myself, "I would make a terrific Robert Smith." And I totally go with that! My hair looks more like something Robert Smith vomited up--or maybe a recovering goth crack addict. I also sometimes have a horrible urge to put on black lipstick but so far I have managed not to succumb.

I went to an outlet mall today and bought some stuff that is potentially summery. All in all, though, I just look like a summery recovering goth crack addict. With red cherry lips!

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